The Strong Willed Battle

Oh my goodness things in our household are a mess!  The house is not been calm and regular since Disney.   My husband has had to go away for work twice, his "grandmother" who was really his Godmother in the church passed away at age 96.   He grew up w/Grandmother, always being there, and a part of his life.  However at the end of her lift that was a mess. Grandmother, constantly criticized us, and made more than one scathing comment about the SWW, only stopping when I explained that she has some behavioral issues and we're working on it.   So you see Grandmother decided to find another man who the priest referred to in his sermon at her funeral as her "Adopted Godson", this man was willing to put his wife and children aside and visit her regularly even when he got a new job in Colorado we live in PA.  But I guess that family w/it's perfect children and easy to love and accept.  Now us, w/the SWW who is not always the easiest to love and accept, me having MS, and my husband having a busy job.  The perfect family guys job involved a lot of traveling so he could arrange his work trips so that he was able to swing past her.  Anyway, my MIL was there for Grandmother through everything.  When her husband passed away, my husband who was then a middle schooler stayed with her.  When she had heart surgery she stayed at my MIL's house for recovery and so on.  Every holiday was spend with Grandmother, every Sunday afternoon they would see each other.  So my MIL and my husband had Grandmother in their lives for over 40 years.  Grandmother did mean hurtful things at the end of her life.  It was as if the 40+ years spent with my MIL and husband had meant nothing. So yesterdays funeral was tough on my MIL and my husband.  The SWW knows something is going on even if she doesn't know what it is.  All she knows is that the family is upset about something which causes her to act out.

I have not been the best strong willed parent either.  I'm confessing here, because I know I need to do better no matter how emotionally exhausting it is.  It's actually colder here than in Iceland according to the radio guy this morning and we've had more snow in the last month than we have had in the last 5 years.  I picked the SWW up from pre-school last week and told her to get in the car.  Instead of getting in the car she ran over to a big snow mound.  I SHOULD have gotten her out of the snow, cold or not, and forced her into her car seat.  What did I do?  I let here play in the snow which does not help the situation at all.  It just tells her that she doesn't have to listen to what I tell her to do.  

I spoke to her early intervention person last night, & learned that she's regressed which is not cool.  Apparently her ability with free play had really improved.  They had started w/a timer at 5 minutes of free play and were up to 15 minutes.  So things were progressing.  

She found a binky yesterday and DID NOT want to give it up.  I actually paid for a sleep consultant to assist me in training the SWW with sleep.  Send me some good STRONG VIBES because I'm not feeling very strong right now.   

This is who we're using:  

Joanne Palermo, M. Ed: Co-Founder

Joanne Palermo is a seasoned mother of three grown children. She holds two degrees in Special Education: a Bachelor’s Degree from La Salle University and a Master’s Degree from Arcadia University. For 30 years, Joanne has worked in all areas of special education but for the past 20 years, Joanne’s focus as a developmental specialist has been helping families and their young children through early intervention.  Joanne’s experience in teaching children with developmental delays has given her a unique insight into how all children learn.

Joanne has always had an interest in sleep and its relation to children’s behavior. She pursued this interest by becoming a Certified Sleep Consultant. She has taught courses in special education at La Salle University and Gwynedd Mercy College. Joanne is currently teaching a course on Autism at St. Joseph’s University. Joanne resides in Ambler, PA.